Image via Wikipedia
A “clingy” co-worker is taking up too much of my time
A co-worker is extremely friendly – you might even call her “clingy.” She is often in my office which can distract me from my work. It’s flattering in a way – we are both single – but I do need some room. How can I express my concerns without hurting her feelings?
You appear to have an admirer which should make you feel quite pleased. She likes to be with you and believes you like to be with her.
You’ve likely been aware of her sociable nature for some time, but now are becoming more sensitive to the fact that her frequent interruptions are beginning to affect your work performance.
I will presume, too, that because you seem to have some fondness for her, you have welcomed her and engaged her in conversation. You’ve communicated the message that you are happy with her regular presence in your office.
You don’t want to hurt her feelings although this may be inevitable because you will in effect be requesting she reduce the amount of time she currently spends with you.
If she has no sense you are planning to make such a request, you could catch her “off guard” resulting in some understandable pain. She could even cut you off completely as a way to cope with her anguish.
I’d recommend you introduce the subject using language that is nurturing and sensitive. Perhaps mention a new assignment – requiring your immediate attention – which will temporarily make you less available to spend time with her.
You could also consider allocating time available to specific days which would allow some social contact but still permit you to attend to your duties. She may appreciate the demands of your position if you explain them clearly showing how you are being evaluated by your supervisor.
She may be feeling guilty for squandering some of her time in any event so your attempt to incrementally reduce the number and length of her visits to your office may, in fact, be appreciated to some extent.
If you are contemplating taking your friendship to the next step – such as a dinner out or a movie, for example, a suggestion of a “date” could somewhat offset your expressed concerns regarding too much social time in your office.
In considering this matter, it will be important for you to assume some responsibility for the situation – don’t blame her. Show sensitivity and if you would like to develop this friendship, tell her how you feel about her and suggest some contact outside the workplace.
Submit your confidential questions relating to work and office life to Simon through our contact page.
Related articles
- Stage 5 Clingy (lovealwayssunny.com)
- I Don’t Have Time For You, So Don’t Get Clingy! (collectress.wordpress.com)
- Jennifer Aniston is still clingy, desperate (wwtdd.com)
- How To Start A Rural Coworking Community (shareable.net)
- Cowo’s 5 questions to Coworking Europe. Manuel Zea’s 5 answers. (coworkingproject.com)
- How To Be A Good Friend (mohammedabdulrasheed.wordpress.com)
- Coworking Provides A Haven For Rural Entrepreneurs (shareable.net)
